There’s a big difference between how successful and unsuccessful people handle failure. That’s why figuring out how to make the best of failure can mean enjoying a better lifestyle, finding more personal satisfaction, and making more money. Whether it’s dealing with a difficult project at work, raising children, writing a book, or learning a new skill, handling failure the right way will keep you on track to finding eventual success. Use these strategies and instead of getting pushed off the right track and feeling frustrated, you’ll continue forward towards where you need to go.
Don’t Blame Others
A critical mistake that many people make when dealing with failure in their lives is to blame other people for it. They may blame their boss, their coworkers, or even their environment for making them fail. Unfortunately this is always a poor choice. You should be ready to take personal responsibility for your failures, and not try to push them onto something outside of yourself. There are several reasons for this.
First, people like other people who accept their mistakes, learn from them, and move on. On the other hand, we tend to dislike the people who always have an excuse and never seem to want to just admit they made a mistake. Another reason to take responsibility for all of your failures is that by doing so you’ll be able to learn from the experience. Even though failing may not be fun, it does give you an excellent opportunity to grow as a person. However, that only happens if you admit where you failed. If you blame other people you’ll never get the chance to really learn from the mistakes that you make.
Discover the Lesson in Your Failure
When you fail you’ve learned a valuable lesson: what not to do. Ignoring this lesson doesn’t make any sense, and you should take away everything from it that you possibly can. Regardless of whether it’s a project at work, or something that has happened in your personal life, by examining what exactly went wrong you can work on ensuring that you don’t have that particular problem again. A common mantra in entrepreneurship right now is that you need to fail fast in order to succeed. While that’s true, it only applies if you actually learn something useful from all of your failures.
Find a Healthy Way to Vent Failure
Even when you’re learning useful lessons from your failure it can still be very frustrating to deal with. That’s why it’s essential to find a healthy, constructive way to get rid of the stress that you feel from failing. Meditation, reading, or exercise are all healthy ways to deal with the negative emotions associated with failing. In fact, meditation is especially useful as it will not only help you to deal with the stress associated with failing, but it will also give you a chance to take a step back and identify all of the lessons that you can learn from a particular instance of failure. Many very successful people have a daily meditation routine, and you can easily adopt one as well.
Talk About it With Other People
Having someone else you can share your failures with can be a great way to get over them quicker. Whether that person is your spouse, boss, or a good friend, they can provide you with the necessary emotional support and guidance that you need to move past this failure and get ready to take a risk again. Bottling up your emotions is not a healthy strategy and it can result in you dwelling on past mistakes way longer than you ought to.
Don’t Take it Personally
A temporary failure is not a reflection on your personal identity, it’s just something that’s happened to you along the way towards success. People who successfully handle failure believe that it’s a temporary stepping stone towards a better state. Those who have a poor failure strategy believe that what happens to them is a reflection on their identities and should be internalized and dwelled upon. The better strategy is to realize that everyone fails, and it doesn’t reflect poorly on you. What does reflect on you, and what people will judge you on, is how you choose to handle failure when it happens.
Change Your Attitude Towards Failure
Winston Churchill once famously said that “Success is the ability to go from one failure to another with no loss of enthusiasm.” Looked at it in that light, you can see that failure is actually a good thing in many situations. It means that you’re out there, taking risks, and making headway towards goals that you’d like to achieve. The quicker you embrace failure the less it can affect you. It’s also helpful to realize that many successful people are out there failing all the time. You might not hear or see about these failures, but they’re happening way more than you think.
Stay Positive About the Future
Failure is temporary, and the people who are best at handling it treat it as a temporary state. No matter how bad it may look in the moment, there is always another chance to try again in the coming weeks and months. Everyone gets beaten down by failure in the short term, but those people who find the most success in life are the ones who keep their eyes on where they’re going, and realize that the end goal is worth the short term pain of failure.
Whether we like it or not, failure is a part of life and having an effective strategy to deal with it is a crucial part of being a healthy, well adjusted person. Like Michael Jordan and Babe Ruth, the most successful people are also ironically the people who fail the most. You can’t succeed unless you’re ready to fail first, and that’s an important lesson to learn. Using the tips above you can learn how to handle failure and make the most out of whatever life throws in your direction.